Totally Illegal

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Table of Contents

1. 01

   North America

   The land of the free is also the land of the very, very specific rule. City councils here will outlaw almost anything at least once — and the paperwork never dies.

   • ·It is completely illegal to eat fried chicken with a knife, fork, or any other utensil; you must eat it with your bare hands.
   • ·It is strictly forbidden to throw snowballs anywhere within the town limits.
   • ·You cannot wear shoes with heels taller than two inches or with a base smaller than one square inch without an official permit.
   • ·The state's name must legally be pronounced in three syllables, with a silent final "s" and the accent on the first and last syllables.
   • ·It is a criminal offense to fraudulently pretend to use witchcraft, sorcery, enchantment, or conjuration to solve problems.
   • ·A person must not paint a wooden ladder, though they are allowed to coat it in a clear protective varnish.
   • ·Depending on the last digit of your car's license plate, there is one specific day every week where it is illegal to drive it.
   • ·A cashier can legally refuse your payment if you try to use too many coins in a single transaction.
2. 02

   Europe

   Centuries of kings, empires, and extremely dedicated clerks left Europe with rule books thicker than castle walls. Some of those rules never got deleted.

   • ·It is a criminal offense to handle a salmon in suspicious circumstances.
   • ·It is completely illegal to own just one guinea pig because they get too lonely; they must live in pairs or groups.
   • ·It is illegal to stop your car on the highway just because you ran out of gas.
   • ·It is strictly forbidden to wear a full suit of armor inside the Houses of Parliament.
   • ·The flying over, landing, or taking off of flying saucers is strictly forbidden, and any alien craft will be impounded.
   • ·It is illegal to sell birdseed to or feed the pigeons in St. Mark's Square.
   • ·It is completely illegal to build sandcastles or dig deep holes on the public beaches.
   • ·It is illegal to walk on the city streets wearing only swimwear or going bare-chested outside of the immediate beach area.
3. 03

   Asia & Oceania

   From megacities with rules about chewing gum to islands with rules about nearly everything else, this half of the world takes its details very seriously.

   • ·It is illegal to possess 50 kilograms or more of potatoes unless you are an authorized agent of the Potato Corporation.
   • ·It is completely illegal to correspond with, or engage in any kind of business with, a pirate.
   • ·It is a legal offense to ring another home's doorbell or knock on their door without a reasonable excuse.
   • ·The importation of any chewing gum into the country is strictly prohibited, with only minor exceptions for dental gum.
   • ·It is illegal to intentionally feed pigeons or other wildlife in public spaces without written government approval.
   • ·It is a serious criminal offense to step on any Thai currency, whether it is a coin or a paper note.
   • ·It is illegal to drive a motorized vehicle, including cars and rented scooters, without wearing a shirt.
   • ·It is entirely illegal for any nuclear-powered ship to enter the country's waters.
4. 04

   Africa, the Middle East & South America

   Three continents, thousands of jurisdictions, and some of the most wonderfully specific laws ever committed to paper.

   • ·It is completely illegal to manufacture, sell, or even carry a single-use plastic grocery bag.
   • ·Parents are legally banned from registering the name "Messi" as their newborn baby's first name.
   • ·It is strictly forbidden for drivers to operate a fuel pump; all gasoline must be pumped by a professional attendant.
   • ·For people working the night shift, one legal hour is officially counted as exactly 52 minutes and 30 seconds.
   • ·Herders and their livestock, like cows and goats, have the absolute right of way on public roads over all motor vehicles.
   • ·It is entirely illegal to dye an animal's fur or feathers for decorative purposes.
   • ·Leaving a highly unwashed, dirty car in a public parking space is an illegal offense.
   • ·Motorcyclists were legally required to print their vehicle's license plate number in giant reflective letters on the back of their safety helmets.
5. 05

   Laws About Animals

   Most laws boss around people. These ones boss around donkeys, guinea pigs, kangaroos, and at least one extremely well-protected pigeon.

   • ·It is completely illegal to keep goldfish in round, spherical bowls or to give them away as fairground prizes.
   • ·It is unlawful for anyone owning domestic fowl to allow their chickens, ducks, or geese to cross the road or run in the streets.
   • ·It is illegal to allow a donkey to sleep in a bathtub.
   • ·All whales, dolphins, and sturgeons caught within three miles of the coast or washed ashore are the personal property of the reigning monarch.
   • ·Mosquitoes are officially outlawed and banned from entering the borders of the village.
   • ·Members of the public are legally prohibited from holding, carrying, or supporting the physical weight of a koala.
   • ·Any dog traveling outside a carrier on a national train must be kept on a leash and wear a muzzle for the entire journey.
   • ·A specific king penguin holds an official, legally recognized military rank within the Armed Forces, requiring human soldiers to salute him.